Mallory From The 1600 Perspective

Some may say David Parkinson's perspective is a bit skewed. We like it that way! David gives his honest, unique and distinctive view of the Bank Holiday meeting

Two more races without rain. What a change from previous years when we gathered in the assembly area on slicks just before the Monoposto cloud rolled into view and the rain, or snow, commenced. Perhaps Simon Davey is a sort of lucky talisman. I was all set for getting him stuffed and mounted on one of those half spherical bases so that he could rock back and forwards at race meetings and we could store him in someone’s garage in between times. But I’ve heard a rumour that both the F1 Drivers and FI Manufacturers Associations have heard of his expertise, and that they want him to replace Max or Bernie, or both. So be nice to him and let’s try and keep him. Good job Simon.

Whilst I’m on about stuffing people and keeping them in a cupboard for Monoposto use at meetings, I have different views on Ewen. He’s done some very good work for me, and with attending meetings to look after Jock, he’s always been ready to give me a hand. But what happens. “Can you just have a look at this car Ewen”. “The clutch is not working, Ewen”. So he’s running round like a scalded cat. He looks after his customers first. Just remember that. And my car is going so much better since he got involved. I’m not sure what he did exactly but he did warn me not to let anyone see the Ferrari emblem on the new engine he’s fitted.

I had a chat with Lee Bennett who was spectating with his father. He was reflecting on his past races and how long ago they now seemed. With his various commitments he was doubtful of racing again. I hope I cheered him up by telling him that in thirty years time, when he’d paid off the mortgage, and got rid of the kids, he could come back to Mono, and still be one of the younger ones.

Although I benefited from his ill luck, I was particularly sorry for Tony Davies who had two non finishes. There are some ridiculous rumours circulating that myself and Tony Cotton had put some kind of a curse on him. What nonsense. If anyone thinks that Tony C and I are the sort of people who would dance, chanting and naked, except for a funny hat, round a fire in the woods at midnight, then they are very much mistaken. Besides, we both caught a chill and nearly missed the meeting ourselves.

Before the race on Sunday, Ewen Sergison advised that if I won he would leap into the lake. As I passed the chequered flag I could see him on the pit wall. If possible he seemed more excited then I was. The lake was forgotten. The barbecue and disco etc went well. All in fabulous weather. A vote of thanks to the Barbie crew who once again did an excellent job. I was about to call it a night and go to bed when Ewen remembered his statement about the lake. Despite protests from myself and Jock he had definitely decided to do it. Accompanied by Sarah, armed with her camera, and Pete Lincoln, Ewen’s henchman, off we went. I tagged along on the grounds that I was sober and if anything went wrong I could probably get them out. Them, because Pete had now decided to follow Ewen’s lead and take a midnight swim. As it turned out they cavorted for a few minutes in the water and came out quite safely.I then went to bed but heard later how the two, wet through, had walked up to the entrance to go through to the camp site, Ewen in his jockeys, Pete naked. As they walked up to the entrance a female security guard opened the gate and let them through without a word.

Ian Hughes arrived with his arm in a sling. Again, nothing to do with Tony C and myself but it’ll be his leg next time. He said he’d fell off his horse. Rumour has it that the vivacious Sara had beaten him up for ill-treating her little car at Anglesey. Unfortunately a crack in the rear alloy plate stopped the car going out on Monday.

Saturday was also a bad day for Richard Evans who had terminal engine problems with his newly acquired 1700cc Formula Renault. The car, not fitted with a dry sump, looked to have run the big end bearings, possibly round Gerards. Dave Brady was another competitor who was out for the first time this year. Out being the operative word as his car failed to finish in the Monday race.

Pedro Ferreira had his first drive in the ex Ewen Sergison car. It gave me great delight to lap it. The nearest I got to it last year was when I kicked it in the pits when no one was looking. Pedro was going well and finished third on Sunday but the Monday race saw him retire when an oil warning light came on.

Eddie Guest, a new member arrived on Monday for his first race. Seeing him arrive I persuaded him to move into the spot vacated by Stephen Brooks. My reasoning being that if you’re around Mono people you get to know them. The front suspension was too soft on the car and he scraped a hole in the nose cone during qualifying. I was proud to be a part of Mono as many of our members rallied round to try and get the set up better. Because of the high casualty rate he even got a third place. He was delighted with both the day and the Mono reception generally. He will be at Donington and could well be another long term member.

Jonathan Baggott, driving the ex Ian Addlesee Van Diemen, had a moment in the Sunday race and destroyed one side of the car. He must have worked hard on Sunday night, as apart from assisting with the Barbie, he also rebuilt the car, sprayed it a different colour, put in an 1800 engine and raced on Monday. (another recruit to the 1800s. Ed)

Henry Fryer also had a moment and the car was bent quite badly. His father seemed confident that repairs would be completed in time for the Donington race.

Chatting to Simon Davey on the Monday in an almost deserted paddock, he was telling me of an occasion at Snetterton when the winning driver was taken for a lap of the circuit in the course car. I think that Castle Combe is the only circuit that continues with this tradition. Anyway, Simon won and got on/in the car. He said that he saw the back of the last spectator heading off and some guy emptying bins. Other then that there were just the dust balls blowing across the paddock.

If you think that this account seems to favour 1600s you’re right. As I am now the 1600 rep I like to put my boys, and girls, first.

David Parkinson

Dutch artist MC Escher's perspective is similar to David's. Picture from Ferrari Owners' Club website, explaining how a double diffuser works. No, really.

Avit-Ford Kent Engine and not at all a Ferrari F1 engine. Oh dear no.

"Eye of newt, and toe of frog,
Wool of bat, and tongue of dog...". Either the 1600 class cook up some spells on its quicker members, or Silverstone are getting the burgers ready for the Grand Prix.

Tony Davies's Renault

David about to pass Pedro Ferreira in the ex-Avit Swift

pics: Andrew Cliffe/Norwich Photo, Ferrari Owners' Club.